My parents taught me valuable lessons in life, like how to value hard work, how to work with money, and morals like honesty and doing the right thing, and so on. But I wish they had also taught me how to deal with failure.

Failure in society

It feels like ‘failure’ is such a dirty word in our society, especially where I grew up. It’s like failure was the end of the story and there was no return. That’s what you were when you failed—a failure.

I fear failure. Honestly, what an insane thing to be afraid of. I’m terrified of something that will most definitely happen—repeatedly.

If I had learnt that failure is not the end, but probably just a bump in the road, I would have been much better off mentally.

It shouldn’t be something to fear, but something to expect when you’re trying things. If you never fail, it’s because you tried nothing.

Current situation

We moved to Australia, and I thought I would easily get a job because I’m highly educated and I have some experience, but I haven’t gotten a job yet. I’m not exaggerating when I say I have applied for about 50 jobs.

I’ve even asked schools if I could just volunteer there to get experience, but they can’t help me. Even my free labour is being rejected.

And now I’m slipping into a deep depression.

In my head

In theory, I know that life is not supposed to be easy. I also know that immigrating to a new country will never be easy, but I still feel like a failure. But I know that I’m not. I’m just new to life here.

My sensei (in South Africa) used to say that something is difficult when you don’t know it, that’s all. When you practice, you will get better at it over time. He was talking about karate stuff, but I think it’s very applicable to life.

Don’t you think it’s toxic that we feel like failures when we’re not good at something with the first try? Failure is part of the process—it’s part of life.


Can you relate? Let me know in the comments.



P.S. If you’d like to contact me, feel free to comment below, send an email to, or follow me on Twitter @M_ClutterBox.